especially 4 my mum n dad.. i luv u all..

well well, its time 2 get emo.. since blogging is a way 2 express how u feel n not juz crapping rite.. hehe.. the following 4 e-mails r so far the one tat made me cried wen reading an e-mail.. n 2 r fr last yr.. wen i was the sch band's drum major.. n durin sports day, somting terrible happened which will "haunt" me 4 my whole bah.. at least i m over with it but i still cant 4get it.. n tat was the 1st time in my secondary sch life, or like after 7 or so yrs tat i havent cried like a baby.. hee.. n i wan 2 thx my frenz who sms-ed me n supported me 2.. here r the 1st 2 e-mails tat my mum n dad sent..

Dear En,

It broke our hearts when we heard your sobbing in the car. May God grant u a good nap and refresh you with His comfort and love. Well there is always up and down in life and we just have to face it squarely. Don't be beaten by any failure when it strikes. Proverbs 24:16 "Though the righteous man falls 7 times, he rises again, but the wicked are brought down by calamity". So be strong in your spirit. Keep looking up to God to guide you through life. The sun is always shining high above the cloudy sky or even over the storm. Do trust and hope like the psalmist Psa 43:5 "Why are you downcast, O my soul? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise Him, my Saviour and my God". In God we will find peace and hope if we rest ourselves in Him.

Failure can always help us to grow up and be better next time. "Failure is the mother of success!" If we can learn from it, then we will succeed in all we do. Just pick yourself up and continue on. Your were doing fine when you managed to control the throw. Never mind the slip of hand, at least the Pancaragam completed the performance with grace. No one fainted or injured. A good ending counts more in the end.

Perhaps some lessons to be learnt to face future challenges:- cast away the spirit of fear (it won't help us anyway, so why worry)- be confident in whatever you are doing (master the skill & knowledge eg in driving)- do within our limit and capacity (be humble, don't risk unnecessarily)- let the mind/spirit be fully alert/active (enough sleep, good health)

We stand beside you always. We will be happy if you just do your best. God will take care of the rest. So cheer up again and face the days with His strength (Zechariah 4:6: .."Not by might nor by power, but by my Spirit" says the Lord Almighty.) God bless! We love you our precious one.Dad


Dearest En,

How are you today ? I hope u r alright .I just read papa's email and mum agreed with him totally.When u broke down in the car, tear rolled down from my eyesand broke my heart too.U have been always cheerfull and take things easy so I pray that u will forget the incident and move on and study hard.About 30 years ago ,an African marathon Olympics runner who couldwin a prize failed to achieve it because half way in the race he had a bad cramp in one of his feet.He couldn't run anymore but he limped and finished the race after many hourslater.All the spectators stood in ovation upon his arrival.Many reporters asked him why he didnt give up after his injury and stillcontinued the race.He answered them," My country sends me to take part inthe race and not just to win the race.Now I have completed my race." Many people remember him until today and a song is written recently in China, " U r our Hero

"How we handle failure is what impress people surrounding us.Be humble and apologise and quickly ammend it. People who broke the guiness record in the world failed hundreds of time in front of vips in the world.Our Lord values success from our heart and our perseverance commitment and not justone time glory in front of people.That's why papa and mum continue to run the race and serve the Lordbecause deep in our hearts we know that though the ministry is not very " successful " but God wantsus to be faithful and focus on Him.As we have said that before we are proud of u to be our son and we are till today and always be.We love you and God loves you too.. mum

n dis was juz last week.. wen i got my spm results.. well, another heartbreaking news.. haiz.. i really tried my best, i thought i could get a gud result, at least can get 50% off 4 my studies now.. but well, i guess God wants me 2 hav a wake up call.. no more last min study.. mayb upsr i did it, mayb pmr i oso did it.. but spm.. NO WAY.. so, u guys who r sittin 4 spm or goin 22 sit 3 spm.. dun play play like me.. if really cant understand, go find a gud tui teacher tat can guide u.. do more prac.. dun "carry the angong's leg at the last min".. i have learnt my lessons n regret, n i hope u guys wont repeat wat i did 2.. but anyway, God is gracious n almighty, i noe he has a better plan 4 me.. n now i m trying my very best 2 study 4 my foundation de.. its very tough, but i got a very important lesson fr my spm.. so, guess it is a blessing in disguise bah.. hee.. n dis r the 2 e-mails my dad n mum sent me..


Dear En,

Good to have you back home all by yourself. Growing up and be independent now! Thank God for the safe journey to and fro. Well life is indeed full of uncertainty with pleasant and unpleasant surprises. We could feel your disappointment but never mind lah. It's over. Reality is a cruel monster and we all need to face up with it squarely. Let the past be buried 6-foot underground as you go on with your Foundation course this year. Thank God for UTAR where you still can realise your dream...Do make good use of your time there to really study smartly so that there will be no regret later on. Exert some self-control and not spend too much time on internet or pursuing the MU team. There should be a limit.

Set the priority right. First thing first ie your study. The sole duty of a student is to study well. That is what you are in now. When graduated and come out to work in society, you have all the time to spend as you like, except when meeting some deadlines. There'll be a season for everything. A time to study, a time to play. A time to surf internet, a time to watch football match, even in the wee hours in the middle of the night. Just plan your work and use your time wisely. Always seek God to guide you in whatever you do. May He grant you an inquisitive mind to want to learn and know all the subject and make the study interesting. Scientists had devoted their lives to come out with all sorts of theories and we benefit ourselves by just studying and using it.

There is no end to learning. In fact too many things to learn. So need to learn smart. Remember the 5 wives and 1 husband techniques? What, when, where, who & why and How? Just link them up and you got a good grasp of the subject matter. Ask and you will receive (understanding, knowledge, experience etc...) Student time is the best in life except for the assignments and exams of course! Life is not rosy all the ways. One needs to jump over all the hurdles and overcome whatever challenges that come the way. That makes life more colourful and beautiful! Though the mountain is high and the sea rough, but once you overcome and stand on top of it, wow, the sense of achievement, joy and honour is just great! It is proportional to all the effort you put in to make it through! Success won't drop from heaven, it is through your own hands and labour you reap the harvest in the end. What you sow is what you reap. Just has to sweat it through to hit the goal.But it all begins with a right attitude. So be focus & diligent. God will enlighten your mind as you study and discover more the wonders of science that affect our daily life so much. Be attentive in class and try to clarify all difficult parts with the tutors. Ask more questions or else the lecturers and tutors wont know how to help. Try to digest new lessons within the week lest you got too much to digest next week...

Need time to really study and master any subject. Other non-important secondary things just has to be put aside to finish the first thing first. My college time had less distraction without this facinating toy called internet. One can really get hooked to it. So be the master of internet and not its slave. 1-year Foundation course is very intensive and tough, actually not much free time to play play also. We can't help much except to uphold you in our prayers. You has to chart your own course and sail through life.

But take courage, with Christ in the vessel we can smile at the storms smile at the storms...Cheers! We thank God for you as you grow in wisdom and stature, and in favor with God and men. That's what desire of you. Good result is a bonus hehe...God bless!dad


Dearest En,

I was glad to hear your sharing about yr camp at Cameron Highland esp the theme sermon ; set your priority right and don't be distracted. Focus is very important as a student besides hard work.You reap what you sew this is what the Bible tells us.Cut down your time with computer and spend more time studying.Foundation 1 yr is tough but smart boy like u with hard work, u can make it. Bro.Anil has agreed to find sc tuitor for you but it is in groups. It is difficult to find one - one tuitor. Maybe u can ask him more info on sunday.Or u can ask yr friends together,u all start a class in yr hostel with Anil'stuitor.

U really have to plan yr studying hrs. 1 day set aside some time to go thru whatu have learned in lectures.Don't accumulate them , u have to study smart and don't study and sms or msn at the same time........In fact u can go to internet to solve yr problem . u can use computer to assist u in yr studies not just for toy and fun.It is yr tuitor and guide.

To be very frank with u, mummy is very shock and disappointed with yr SPM result.But i think this is what u reap, if u have started tuition earlier yr result is reversed.Only if u have cut down your activities and more focus then thing is different. Evaluation is very important. Like u told me in yr sms, u learned a lesson after result.Don't worry u can't get scholarship, we have money for your education, we have planand have saved money for you when you were very small.

Lets us all pray to our good LORD Jesus Christ to give u good concentration, focus and interestin your study in Utar, to glorify his name. Pa and I love u very much and we believe u love us as much too. We can feel it.Bye and take good care. IN ALL YR WAYS ACKNOWLEDGE HIM , HE WILL MAKE YR PATHS STRAIGHT. Loving you ,Mummy

well, tats all.. i really thx God 4 blessing me with such gud parents.. haiz, wen staying 2gether with dem, u say they r annoying, keep on saying the same things.. den ll b 2 worry abt u n other things.. but now, staying alone far but not very far oso la fr home, u oni realize how important r ur parents.. the luv they gav... the care they gav.. n everything tat they did n do.. so, i hope the e-mails above can b somting helpful 4 u all oso, though ur parents may not b gud in expressing n showing their luv out, but i blive every parent in this world r trying their best 2 do so.. coz we r their children.. n if really ur parents dislike u or watsoever.. there is ALWAYS some1 there who luv u.. n tat is our ABBA FATHER, GOD!! no matter how sinful u r, no matter how bad or naughty u r, no matter how baddest, awful n those word tat describe the worst, juz if u r willin 2 repent n accept God in2 ur heart, like wat i did.. HE ll 4giv u can wash ur sins away, tat is y he was crucified on the cross, juz 2 save us out of our sins.. cheers!! God loves u n me.. =)